12./ ????!

i think no one really knows who they are in life until they come to stage where they have everything they've ever wanted and needed... but until then people have aims and goals and paint a picture of what they want in life....
i dont though.... my pictures blank - i have no idea who i am or who i want to be????

11./ I dunno.... :S

sometimes i feel like im on a different planet...
i dont think anyone really understands me...
most of the time i feel like im alone and i dont really have a home...
friendships drift apart...
things change...
people change...
i dont know what to do or who to talk to...
lifes confusing sometimes and im jealous of people who have it easy and breeze through...
THATS DEFO NOT ME!...
i try to do everything not to be alone and listen to my thoughts cause thats when its the worst...
someone help?!...


im worlds apart!...

10./ umm..... I miss you!!....

okay i guess it's always hard to tell someone you miss them but i can't hold it in any longer... i miss you!! i miss you soo much it's hard to say and i just need you to know that! i miss being best friends and miss having the laughs we used to... i miss being able to tell you things i can't tell anyone now... i miss YOU!! you say people don't really understand you and you hand around with people who are nothing like you - well i get you! you have this awkwardness about you like you have to bottle things up cause you're so used to it.. you create a wall around you and don't let anyone in because you don't want to get hurt again like you have so many other times before! i know you and understand why you do these things because i do the exact same - i haven't been able to keep a solid friendship in ages and it sucks! if you just talk to me then we can work through this ...... I MISS YOU!!! xxxxxxxxxx

9./ Big Adventure!...

HayleyGibson. MsWight. IndiaMcLoedKay. MsHooper. StewartAllan. MrsLax. CaitlinThomson.

Anthems.
"Home" - Michael Buble. "Rude Boy" - Rihanna. "Ayo Technology" - Acoustic Version. "Oh My God" - Kaiser Chiefs. "Here Come The Girls" - Sugababes. "I Can See Clearly" - Johnny Nash. "Take The Weather" - Jimmy Buffett. "Man, I Feel Like A Women" - Shania Twain. "To The Left" - Beyonce. "Can't Touch This" - MC Hammer. "Forever Young" - Mr Hudson. "Baby" - Justin Beiber. "We're Going To Ibiza" - Venga Boys. "Nasty Girl" - (Stewart). "Leaving On A Jet Plane" - John Denver / Chantal Kreviazuk (Armagedon).



Memories to Remember - Italy.

'To the Max Mrs Lax'. 'Super Ms Hooper'. 'Get it right Ms Wight'. Crazy Taxi Man in Rome. The Tunnel Of Love - Marmore Waterfall. Tour around Roma. "Mrs Lax remember Caitlins Juice!" - shouts across airpot :Ms Hooper (News). India trampelled on. Hayley + Caitlin chatted up by Joseph :P haha. Sleepover in French Hotel - lolz. Ethan - Airport. BEN! - Stewart teasing. I heart Roma Shopping. Amazing Ice-cream. Stargazing Saturn + Funky Slideshow music. Addidi with Federica. Classroom experience. Steel Factory + the wobbly bridge. Eye Spy! Competition Points. Stewarts hat in Rome (Ms Wight). Squished on the Metro. haggling ;]. Campsite at Airports. Creme Eggs. Ear popping tunnells. Debates and Discussion. Pringles. Terni host families (Duh!?). Barometer :P. ICT room for 3 hours. Checking out guys (India+Caitlin) and girls (Stewart). Google Translate and English Dictionary. Random Dancing. "Hoopsies!" Moustache Man on Airplane + Guy with huge sandwhich on Spanish Steps.

Memories to Remember - France.

Stewarts 'Head Shoulders Knees And Toes' (football). Spit card game. 'Can't touch this... "pyjama time!". STEWARTS IRISH ACCENT! Inflatable football. Huge picnic in middle of Paris next to the Louvre overlooking the Eiffel Tower (extra bread required). Nearly missed the train. Hayleys powernaps in the most random places (metro. the louvre. trains. airports.). Stewarts haggling skills :D. Step Up 2 Dude. Creepy french doctor. Base camp (x4). Creilball - Hayley won. WE HATE METRO!! nervousness - Stewart! Eurostar 1st class to London. Sleeper train to Edinburgh. Drive home. Off school ;]. £1000 I owe Stewart - Journal.

LOTS OF LAUGHTER, FUN AND GAMES!! xx

8./ From Rome to Paris...and then home!

Well, on the Thursday we didn't really expect a Volcano to erupt in Ice Land and for all the airports to close so we got on one of the last flights to Paris, where we made a living in a town called Creil for a few days :D. We stayed in this really nice hotel and just chilled on the Friday seen as we didnt have much to do - it was a really good extended break! On the Satuarday however we got the train to Paris to spend the day sight seeing - i mean what a waste if we didn't right?! We went to the Louvre and ahd a picnic in the gardens, we seen the Eiffel tower and stood underneath it, the massive arc in the middle of the roundabout?! :P lol There was definitely a lot to take in!! We got back exhausted at like midnight cause we couldn't get a stupid taxi :P haha and then i was sick at night and Sunday morning i was sick again then they called a doctor who was really creepy :S and we just chilled for the day while i was in bed dying lol. On the Monday it got really hectic and my teacher was so stressed :P she was freaking out because we had to travel home that day and she wanted everything to be set and organised :D don't worry we got home okay - 1st class on the Eurostar and a bed on the night sleeper from London to Edinbrugh where Stewarts dad brought me home :) and that's that my big adventure :P
Now i'm back to boring old Kirkcaldy! :( The old usual routine and the uneventful weekends lol... but i'll be fine - afterall it is HOME! xxx

7./ Italy first i guess!...

Back from my holiday and can't wait to tell all. Our arrival in Italy we just met out host families and stayed with them the night (Federica and her family), i had a feast for my dinner!! That's the Italian way! ;] First day in Italy our school group met up and went for the day in Rome - we went to the colesium, the trevi fountain, the spanish steps and many more tourist sights (i took a lot of pics :). On the Tuesday we went to visit a famous steel factory in Terni which was okay i guess - if you like steel :P lol. After that we went to our hosts school and got their classroom experience :S it was certainly different from ours anyway! It was very awkward when they hardly speak any english and are trying to ask you something (we love google translate :D) After school we went home for lunch (school finishes at 2 o'clock) with federica and her friends, then we went for the rest of the day to this beautiful city on a mountain called Assisi! We had so much fun :D It was definitely a long day and went straight to bed when we got in! The Wednesday was pretty much our last day in Terni so we went to see another sight in Terni called the Marmore Waterfall - it was amazing, we even went underneath the waterfall and got soaked :P i had to hairdry all of my clothes when i got back :D. Later that night we went stargazing until 12 o'clock and i was dead by the time we got home! Another early rise on the Thursday and a goodbye to Italy.... but the trip didn't end there!!
xx

6./ Goodbye... For Now!

Italy tomorrow with India - can't wait... i'm sooo excited!! :] A bit nervous too though - i mean staying with someone i don't really know :P haha... But i'm sure it'll be fun :D I've never been abroad away from my Mum or family before - so this is definitely a first! I'm gonna miss everyone - all my friends, family and my MUM in paticular!!! :( So... i guess this is goodbye for now at least.. well until next Friday ;]
signing off for the week :).....
The Constant Dreamer...
(or you can just call me Hayley - Haylz for short ;])

xxxxxxxxxxx

5./ Old Friends Mean Just As Much!...

"make new friends but keep the old, some are silver and others are gold"

**

"i have a hand and you have another, put them together and we have each other"

**

India <3

been best friends for like ages and through fallouts and all that crap,

we've still made it through and nothings changed i love you all the same, nothing can tear us apart... (yn)

love you btw :]

xxxx

4./ New Year - New Friends...

The Year of 2010


1./ becca.....

good times and bad. some fun and some sad.
boringly hilarious. very much various.
smiles and pouts. no other doubts.
the gossip and games. what other aim.
late night chat. not only that.
been hyper and lonely. but we're the one and only!



2./ eilidh.....

sugar and spice, all so nice.
no one would know, to find out though.
crazy and fun, all in one.
quiet and caring, so loving but daring.
sweetest smile, such like a child.
that's why i love her so, she has a certain glow!



love you both muchly <3



(a whole frickin cheesy poem - you guys are soo lucky - it rhymes and everything! lol :P)

3./ The Memories...

many memories ~ lots to share...

friendship means the world .

seems like forever
-that's why best friends are there.

from nursery through primary and all the way to high school
-all of those year.
been through some tough times together
-they only made us stronger.
we've had our ups and downs
-we fought through them.
all of our fallouts
-when you shuved me into a hedge and i pushed you back into a wheely bin, msn tears, birthday winners :P.
with fallouts we make up
-hugging and handshakes and all of that stuff~yn!
the gossip
-boy talk and lots of bitching.


been through a lot of crap so far and i'm sure as hell that we'll go through a tun more ~ but just remeber it's me and you against the world!! <3

Haylz+Natz
xxxxx

2./ Off With A Bumpy Start!?

Dear Readers,
What to say? What to say? ...I pretty much gave you a snippet of the download on my life before, so this is the continued. My mum got accepted for fostering btw -- I think i missed that out -- that pretty much means less boyfriend but only she'll have to give more attention to the foster kid. Nothing against it but it's just gonna get lonlier, I know this sounds really selfish but for once I want all the attention. I just miss my mum. No reason even talking about my dad - he's an ass, no more said to it. A lot has happened to me and my family in the past. Never really having a father figure and all, well that really sucked! All you people with dads out there that actually care about you, you're so lucky you even have a proper one! My mum and dad divorced when i was 4 years old and from then on my mum had to cope all on her own. I love her so much and she's like my inspiration -- she's so strong and can get through anything -- i just really miss her! Moving on... some people are also really lucky that have close siblings and you all gey along - which i do not understand - all i've ever known was arguing and fighting soo that didnt help much. My big sister thinks she'll an adult ad can just boss me around. My little sister is just soooo annoying, its like thats her goal in life to annoy me! My big brother he just thinks he rules everything -- since he's well 'the man of the house' -- he's such a boy!! He's not the protective brother that i hoped for anyway. Gosh, i bet i'm making it sound like my life absaloutley sucks! :P It's not all that bad, i mean we do have the good times!! :D I love my family really -- i mean i can't exactly hate them (they're FAMILY!) It's just sometimes you get so frustrated with everything you just have a huge rant... thats what i tend to do! Lol. I can't imagine life without my friends - I'd definitley spend ALL day dreaming without them! I mean no one can live without friends - you need them! (yn) Best freinds mean the world - couldnt make it through the day without them - Love them Muchly... So you pretty much got the full download on me tonight but dont think this wont be continued... I'm signing off - The Constant Dreamer!


xxxxxxxxx

1./ A Beginning...

Dear Readers,
Things are starting to change around me. My life in general. My big sister will soon be moving out. My little sister acts like she wants nothing to do with me anymore. My big brother... well he's a boy what else can i say. My mum doesn't really see it but she's changing too. It started with the new boyfriend, she's never really been good at choosing the right one. He's nice but i dunno, she just isn't the same when he's around - yes she's happy, which is the main thing, but whenever he's not around she never talks to us its like shes in a constant mood. She goes out whenever she can and then it just gets lonely. And then there's my dad, i wouldn't even call him that. He surely doesn't act like one. He remarried and has a new family - I just didn't feel welcome anymore. I'm not the typical teenager, who gets to go out all the time with her friends, have a boyfriend or have fun really. I certainly don't go out drinking or smoke, i don't get off with any guy i just meet or anything like that. I'm the responsible one in the family - well someone has to be and i guess it just lies on me. So, if i don't go out with my friends and don't have a boyfriend, what do i do? Well, i have tuns of hobbies and I can do in my spare time but i'm just so used to sitting around all day I developed a habbit. I Live In The Life Of A Constant Dreamer! I dream, it's probably not a good thing to get into the habbit of because you can get carried away but it's like addiction - i need it. It's the best part of my day. It's when i get to block out everything that's going on around me and finally focus on me - i'm in my own bubble, where no one disturbs me or can say anything to change something in my life. It's all in my head - I dream of the perfect life. Thats me ~ The Constant Dreamer...

xxxxxxxxxxx